Why I stopped breastfeeding

Most of you know that I have been breastfeeding my son since the day he was born and it hasn’t been all fun and games. It has been hard, time consuming, stressful, painful, and it really takes a toll on your body. BUT, you do what is best for your child albeit the fact that it is HARD. It is my pet peeve when people say they didn’t breastfeed because it was difficult or they just “couldn’t”.

Fun fact: Every single human can breastfeed. What did children eat hundreds of years ago when formula didn’t exist? No ones milk supply comes immediately after birth and it takes some work for your body to start producing and supplying you with milk. Breastfeeding is a supply and demand kind of business. The more you breastfeed (or pump) the more your body works to supply your demand!

Believe me I get it, it is a full-time job and you need commitment and resilience to be able to keep up, unless you are one of the lucky few who has been blessed with an oversupply of milk. In that case, count your blessings. I know it isn’t for everyone and that’s okay but I just think that the benefits of liquid gold outweigh the struggles.

Why I decided to breastfeed…

I am a firm believer in science and research, which probably stems from studying Psychology as an undergrad. Whatever the reason, research is the first thing I do when I want information on something – and I don’t mean Google. I mean published research that you can find on different websites that include an abstract and everything. You know research researchthe-breastfed-baby-poster-by-the-alpha-parent.jpg

Disclaimer: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. I am not against formula feeding. I’m just providing you with facts about breastfeeding based on countless studies.

Here are the facts presented in one particular article that just blew my mind:

  • “The risk of hospitalization for lower respiratory tract infections in the first year is reduced 72% if infants breastfed exclusively for more than 4 months”
  • “The severity (duration of hospitalization and oxygen requirements) of respiratory syncytial virus bronchiolitis is reduced by 74% in infants who breastfed exclusively for 4 months compared with infants who never or only partially breastfed”
  • “It has been calculated that more than 900 infant lives per year may be saved in the United States if 90% of mothers exclusively breastfed for 6 months.”
  • “There is a protective effect of exclusive breastfeeding for 3 to 4 months in reducing the incidence of clinical asthma, atopic dermatitis, and eczema by 27% in a low-risk population and up to 42% in infants with positive family history”
  • “There is a reduction of 52% in the risk of developing celiac disease in infants who were breastfed at the time of gluten exposure.”
  • ” there is a 15% to 30% reduction in adolescent and adult obesity rates if any breastfeeding occurred in infancy compared with no breastfeeding”
  • “Up to a 30% reduction in the incidence of type 1 diabetes mellitus is reported for infants who exclusively breastfed for at least 3 months”
  • “There is a reduction in leukemia that is correlated with the duration of breastfeeding. A reduction of 20% in the risk of acute lymphocytic leukemia and 15% in the risk of acute myeloid leukemia in infants breastfed for 6 months or longer.”

I mean these are the findings of just ONE article. Can you imagine that you, as a mother, have the power to REDUCE the risk of certain diseases such as diabetes. That’s mind-blowing!

Read the article here.

Keeping all these facts, plus more, in mind I knew that I wanted to breastfeed from day 1.  The first thing I told the nurses at the hospital was that there would absolutely be no formula and that he would be exclusively breastfed. I didn’t even make it an option, which I feel like was the main driving point for me to work harder to kick-start my supply. When you set your mind to something, whether it’s to formula feed from birth or to breastfeed, you’re already mentally prepared to do so.

My breastfeeding journey…

I breastfeed Levon, my son, for about 3 weeks until I realized it just wasn’t working out for us. I literally didn’t and couldn’t leave my bed because he would eat 15 min, sleep 30 min, eat 15, sleep 15, eat 20, sleep 10. It was just an extremely exhausting and depressive cycle. He was getting frustrated with me because he was still hungry and I was getting frustrated because I was bed bound. After weeks of trying to make it work I decided to pump and bottle feed. I figured, at least he’s getting breastmilk!

I was really upset about it at first because obviously breast feeding was way better than bottle feeding for many reasons. The most important being that the babies saliva tells your body which immune factors to produce in order to protect the baby from certain infections (more here). However, I grew fond of the idea because now he was full and could sleep in peace and he wouldn’t get used to being in my arms all day.

The first time I pumped, this is all that came out!

When it came to my supply it was like a roller coaster ride and very restrictive. In the beginning it was barely there because my body was just getting used to a new vacuum – pumping. Then once I got the hang of it and could actually leave the house for 2 hours (max) it was like heaven lol. It was not ideal, but it was good enough for me.

My pump was attached to my hip at all times, so much so that I had this intense fear of leaving the house without it. You know when you’re about to dash out the door and you do a little mental rundown to make sure you have everything. Well, the first thing on my list was “did you pack your pump and all the other sh*t that goes with it?” I would be the mom next to you in the dressing room pumping because it’s almost time for a feeding and I don’t want to get screamed at in the middle of the mall. I was also the mom that went to parties with her pump. At my cousin-in-laws wedding I would go to the brides private room, take off my dress, pump, secure the milk in a bottle, wrap the bottle in something, tape it down, then Uber it to my house so my mom could feed him. Oh, and the pumping happened every 30 minutes because I had a low supply. It’s safe to say I was pretty much not present at that wedding, that’s what I mean by very restrictive. But like I said earlier, it’s a sacrifice you make and it’s challenging but it’s worth it!

I did however have times, well one time, where I was producing a good amount and could actually go on vacation…YAY! I think it took me like a month to save up for a 3 day vacation lol, but I had no complaints because that was better than no vacation.

Basically, my son was exclusively fed breastmilk for 4.5 months until I got a really bad infection and it effected my milk supply immensely. Anytime I got sick or my body was trying to overcome something my supply dropped tremendously. I would pump every single hour to get a few ounces of milk so I could feed him. It was torture! This infection was a little bit different though, it had gotten really dangerous and a lot worse in a matter of days so I needed to start on antibiotics ASAP. Since I was on antibiotics I decided to give him formula because my doctor and I decided that we didn’t want to expose him to that if we didn’t have to. I also kind of had no choice because I was producing close to nothing.

I had gone through a crazy depression period because of my supply for about a month leading up to my infection. It was as if postpartum depression had hit me 3 months after having the baby. I didn’t want to eat, leave the house, talk to anyone, nothing. I just wanted to stay in bed and hang out with the baby. I wasn’t making that much milk and it was a constant mental and physical struggle to get through the day. I hid it pretty well from my family and friends but it was pretty much the low point of my postpartum days. Your mood and your mental strength has everything to do with your body producing milk and since I wasn’t able to get myself out of that funk, my supply was suffering. It’s safe to say a cup of hormones with a dash of depression and a sprinkle of an infection led me to stop breastfeeding.

Introducing, formula…

This was the toughest transition for me. I would cry every time I gave Levon a bottle of formula (hormones are NO JOKE) because I felt like I had failed him. It was hard for me to see it any other way because of all the knowledge I had about breastmilk. But eventually I realized that I had no choice, I couldn’t starve him with my nonexistent milk supply so this was what I was forced to do. To be honest, because I was forced to give formula (no supply and being on antibiotics) I didn’t feel as bad about it. It was the perfect “excuse” to make me feel better. Now he is a few days shy of being 7 months old and he drinks formula.

Is life easier this way? YES, obviously. Can I go on vacation anytime I please? YES. Can I finally leave the house without my heavy pump? YES. Can I finally enjoy some wine? YES. Would I do it all over again in order to breastfeed? YESSSS!

Which formula I use..

I’ve only given him Holle formula which is an imported product from Europe.

Why? Because it is:

  • Highest European Organic standards (99% organic – small local farms production)
  • Unmatched quality of ingredients compared to other leading brands
  • Free from: added sugar – color – gluten – wheat – preservatives
  • Contains NO: Brown rice syrup/DHA – ARA/harmful GMO or fluoride!

Moms, read your ingredient labels when it comes to formula! If the first ingredient is high fructose corn syrup then remember that that is THE MOST potent ingredient in that formula. Also, just because your doctor suggests a certain formula brand that does not mean you have to give your baby that formula! Most pediatricians are paid by those brand reps to advertise ONLY their formulas. Just like pharmaceutical companies pay most doctors to push out ONLY their meds. Just do your own thorough research.


That’s pretty much the whole story on my breastfeeding experience and why I stopped.

I hope this was helpful to some of you and if you are going through the same struggles just remember that you have to stay mentally strong in order for your body to produce milk. I know, easier said than done. But you got this, don’t give up!

If you have any questions feel free to comment below.





Mother’s Day Gift Guide

Every year when Mother’s Day rolls around I think of what to buy the best mama in the world. She’s a wine lover, so maybe some nice wine glasses? Or maybe something personalized with pictures of us, like a calendar? Oh, and by us I mean the baby. No one cares about me anymore (eye roll). Whatever it is, I put a lot of thought into it because my mom deserves it.

I think the best “gifts” are ones you really put some thought into, something that has some sort of meaning behind it. I mean things are nice but they are even nicer when they provide the person with an emotional response.

So here’s my list of Mother’s Day gifts for every mom at every age.


…for the older mama that needs a little self-love


…for the beauty loving mama

Workout Necessities

…for the mama that kicks ass at the gym

Doggy Goods

…for the mama who loves her pup

Travel Necessities

…for the jet-setter mama

Home Decor

…for the stylish mama

Kitchen Appliances

…for the mama who loves to cook

Cheese Board

…for the mama who loves wine and cheese

Office Decor

…for the hard working mama who loves a snazzy desk


…for the mama who likes to stay organized

Comfy Stuff

…for the mama who loves to stay in

Coffee Machine

…for the mama who needs a morning wake-me-up 

Pamper At Home

…for the mama that needs a little R&R32.jpg

Wait, there’s a service out there that bring professionals to my house to do my hair and nails? As in, I don’t have to get a baby sitter to get a mani pedi? So I don’t have to wait a week with fugly nails and I can do it NOW? Umm, sign me up!

Glamsquad offers at home beauty services for reasonable prices in:

And by reasonable prices, I really mean reasonable! You pay $45 to get a shitty blowout at Drybar (not including tip) and for just $50 you get an experienced hairstylist to give you a bomb blowout, at home! Genius, right?! Click here for $25 off your first service.

Spa Treatment

…for the hard-working mama


I live for spa days and I think it’s the best way to relax and renew the mind. I always leave the spa with a clear mind and a relaxed body. If my husband is reading this, please take me to the spa for Mother’s Day, thanks babe. Oh, and a Chanel bag would be nice too. Just kidding.

…not really.


…for the mama that loves to shop, aka all moms

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Gift cards are perfect if you don’t have time and can’t decide on what to buy.


…for the mama who loves a personal touch

Shutterfly is my go to destinations for a sentimental and personalized gift. I love making custom photobooks or calendars filled with sweet memories.


Happy Mother’s Day

to all the amazing, hard-working, loving, caring, trendsetting, and all-things-wonderful mamas out there.

You guys rock!

Being a mom is not easy but it sure is rewarding, especially on Mother’s Day 😉




My Sons Nursery

I have been wanting to post pictures of my sons nursery for quite sometime now…better late than never right? I had it decorated before he was born so it was ready by the time he had his newborn photoshoot. However, I have been wanting to add and change things but haven’t found the time and I realized this post will never go up if I wait to redesign a few things.

I’ll start off with my inspiration…

As you can see I wanted something neutral, calm, and airy. I’m not into the cliché blue for boys, I literally can’t stand it. I’m very much about calming nudes and pastels. I included a lot of animals in his room and I must admit my absolute favorite part of his bedroom is the animal prints from ElfinLilac on Etsy. The artist, Antonia, is so sweet and talented. Her prints are high quality and they come in the mail in less than a week. I’ve referred her to all my friends and family and everyone who’s purchased from her shop has been very pleased. I’ll definitely be ordering from her again!

His Newborn Photoshoot…

Photographed by the amazing Tina Arutyunyan.

Nursery Details…


Toy Basket (Home Goods)


Custom Acrylic Name & Clouds from HugBug


Custom Happy Birthday frame from Things Remembered | Tray (Home Goods)
Bookends (Home Goods)
Custom Album Shutterfly



Crib | Mattress | Dresser

Similar Options…


Fitted Sheet | Bumper | Crib Skirt

Similar Options…


Hamper | Storage Box

Similar Options…



avalon-throw-blanket--102668M 52-front-1-300-0-2048-2048-q40
Similar Options…

 Similar Options…

Hope you guys enjoyed this post!


Favorite Baby Products

OK, it’s no secret I am a full blown product junkie. I mean lets be real my previous tagline used to be “The go-to blog for makeup junkies.” So fitting. Which is why it comes as no surprise that I’m a crazy-product-junkie-mom. Who does that benefit? Well definitely not my husbands wallet, for sure. Poor guys hates going to Target or Buybuybaby with me. But I can’t help it I just want to find great products for me and my baby. That’s why I try everything, well everything with the RIGHT ingredients. If I’m willing to buy something twice, or keep backups in the closet, then I know I love that product. I’m basically going to be listing all my loves that I use on a daily basis in this post.

P.S. All the affiliate links below are to buybuyBABY & they always have 20% off coupon codes every month. This months code is:


Dr. Brown’s Wide-Neck Glass Bottle

I have like 7 of these bottles (plus some extras stashed away) currently drying on my rack. I used to hate these bottles because they would leak ALL THE TIME but I figured out that I was pairing the two inserts incorrectly (video below for reference). I also noticed that once I stopped “sanitizing” my bottles after every use the inserts wouldn’t get loose. By sanitizing I mean pouring boiling hot filtered water over them AFTER I’ve washed them. I used to do this every single time I washed all his bottles.


  • I love these because they have an easy flow
  • The nipple has one small hole so it prevents the baby from chugging their milk quickly (huge plus for me). Benefits? They eat slower so they notice they are full and don’t cry for more. They don’t throw up your hard earned liquid gold, aka breastmilk, (or formula).
  • Reduces colic, gas, and spit-ups.
  • It’s glass which is the main reason why I love it. Why is glass better than plastic?IMG_0344.JPG

The only cons is that there are so many parts that it’s annoying to wash & if you pair the insert incorrectly they leak.


Boon Lawn Countertop Drying Rack

I love this little lawn because the grass holds all different shapes and sizes, its BPA free, doesn’t scratch bottles, doesn’t rust, and it’s just really easy to use. If you are a new mom I would suggest buying the large one because bottles eventually add up. I also have the stand insert so I can hang his pacifiers, mini teething toys, pumping essentials, etc.


Dr. Brown’s Bottle Brush

Since we are on the topic of washing bottles… I have 2 favorite brushes that make this task easy peasy. One is this Dr. Brown’s brush (get it in pink!) and the other is the Munchkin brush. I always have back-ups of both because I butcher my brushes when I’m washing bottles and I also like to switch it out often (just like you switch out dishwashing sponges) because bacteria tends to build up. I don’t have a preference, I just kind of go with whatever I find in the store. If you are traveling though I would suggest the Munchkin one because it’s smaller and it also has a nipple cleaner on one end.


Mylicon Dye Free Drops

Ok, lets be real for a second. How many times a day does your baby get fussy? Mine, at least 3-4 times a day…usually before nap time (he does this new thing where he’s super sleepy but refuses to nap…joy). I mean babies are BABIES at the end of the day, they have good days and bad days. Some days they are angels and most days you wonder how you got here. Like why me?! Why today!

When they are newborns they are usually fussy because of gas and this is initially what this product does, is break up gas bubbles in their stomach. So if you are a new mom and you are looking for an IMMEDIATE cure to your babies gassiness, then this is a life saver. I literally wouldn’t leave the house without it and I had backups upstairs & downstairs. Yes, it’s that much of a necessity.

My son is a few days shy of being 5 months old and I still use it every.single.day! Not for gas though.

Let me put it this way…

It’s 10pm. He’s sleepy. You’re sleepy. He’s bathed and clean. You smell from running around all day. He wants to sleep but is getting frustrated because he needs just a little bit of help. Your pat on the butt isn’t helping and at this point he’s full on screaming at you *this is where you cuss out your husband for knocking you up*. So what do you do? Well, you just insert that pretty yellow syringe into this magical cocktail and you give your baby some damn Mylicon. Instantly, he’s sucking his paci and your butt patting is working. Five minutes later he’s knocked out.

No there is no sleeping aid in this… although it works so well I secretly think there might be lol.

It DOES NOT absorb into the body like gripe water…so you can use it up to 12x a day.

:: Google: mylicon absorption vs gripe water.

Anyways, I love this stuff and I only use it for extreme cases of fussiness because like anything else, I don’t want to overdo it. I would suggest doing your own research on this stuff or consulting your doctor but in my experience it’s one of those things I always have on hand.


Mustela® Gentle Cleansing Gel

I love Mustela products because they are hypoallergenic and really gentle on babies skin because they are made for babies skin. I use this specific product only on the babies body and it cleans him up really well without drying him out. I find that most body washes don’t remove the sticky stuff, like diaper rash creams, but this product does! I don’t like to use this in his hair because it makes his hair really oily.

What I love most about this product…

  • Biodegradable formula is composed of 90% plant-based ingredients
  • Fortified with Vitamin B5 to keep skin’s natural oils intact
  • Paraben, and Phenoxyethanol free
  • Hypoallergenic and specially formulated to minimize the risk of allergic reactions

If you have a newborn, I highly highly recommend getting the Mustela newborn foam shampoo. This is the only shampoo I used on Levon for months (still use it sometimes). They also have the foam shampoo for babies with cradle cap (don’t use it unless your baby has it).


SheaMoisture Foaming Wash/Shampoo

Currently, I am loving this SheaMoisture shampoo with raw shea camomile and argan oil. I’m very careful to not use any harsh chemical on the baby and so I never use anything with fragrance (only natural fragrance from essential oils), parabens, sulfates, etc. Anyways, this stuff is gentle but smells great. It cleans all the puke out of his hair, yup thats a serious issue in my house lol. My son likes to roll around in his one throw-up. Incredible right? I mean the kid is talented! I literally can never clean it in time. He just always wins. I also love foam shampoos because I can feel the lather, you know.

Some pros…


SheaMoisture Massage Oil

I’m one of those parents who treats my baby like a mini adult, okay. I have conversations with him in the mornings about our day, I rant about how I need a manicure, I tell him how Harvard is the best fit for him, and I occasionally teach him how to make a burrata salad. I just keep it real with him, he’s like my confidant. Anyways, back to the point. Since I, as an adult, love to go to the spa and get massages I feel like my mini adult would love it too *substitute the massage bed for a changing table* LOL. I’m not a talented masseuse but he’s a baby and doesn’t know the difference so just rubbing him in oil is good enough. I give him a massage at least once a week and I just rub him down everywhere except his private parts *booty included*. Here’s a little video that was really helpful for me.

P.S. This was the ONLY oil I found without any added fragrance!


  • Argan Oil, high in vitamin E, softens and renews the skin.
  • Precious extracts of frankincense and myrrh have been given as gifts of beauty throughout history and work to repair and rejuvenate skin.
  • Certified organic ingredients.
  • Never tested on animals.
  • Sulfate free and color safe.
  • No parabens.
  • No phthalates.
  • No paraffin.
  • No gluten.
  • No propylene glycol.
  • No mineral oil.
  • No synthetic fragrance.
  • No PABA.
  • No synthetic color.
  • No DEA.
  • No animal ingredients.
  • No sulfates.

Basically, just a damn good product!


Babyganics Fragrance-Free Alcohol-Free Foaming Hand Sanitizer

Alcohol free & fragrance free. SOLD! I’m a total germaphobe when it comes to the baby. I literally sanitize all the time, as much as I want to build his immunity I still remind myself that he’s a baby. SO, a non-drying hand sanitizer that’s harmless to him is a win for me. I have a few around the house.


NoseFrida Snotsucker Nasal Aspirator

Does that say snotsucker? Yes, yes it does. I never liked syringe bulbs for getting rid of boogers, I just couldn’t figure them out. Thankfully, there’s NoseFrida. You basically squirt some saline drops in the baby’s nose then you suck the boogies out. Sounds disgusting, but its totally not. The blue insert keeps the snot from actually going in your mouth lol. Plus you can suction the crap out of those suckers much better than a syringe. Oh, and I find that its easier to do this AFTER you’ve given the baby a bath because I feel like snot softens during bath time (maybe from the heat? not sure, but it works better lol).

P.S. If your baby has trouble pooping use the TheWindi to help them. This stuff is so easy to use and so helpful when the baby is really uncomfortable because of gas or from being backed up (great for babies with constipation…use it with coconut oil).


Blooming Baby Bath Lotus

I bathe the baby in his Summer Infant Tub which I love because it’s cheap (I can just get rid of it once he outgrows it bc I have used and abused mine), easy for newborns, soft, foldable, and its just a simple tub. BUT, before, when I didn’t insert my bath lotus in it it was so hard to use. I was a new mom, had no idea how to hold a baby, let alone bathe one, and it was a little intimidating because newborns are really small and the tubs are really big compared. I didn’t bathe my son for the first month of his life, I was that scared. Then, I started using this and it took up a lot of that “scary space” and made it easier for me. Now that he’s older I use it to hold his back up and that way I can give him a bath using both hands. My favorite part is that it’s really soft, dries easily, and I can show it in the washer with the rest of his laundry.

Two things…

You can use this in your sink  if you wash your baby there. I don’t have a convenient enough sink so I’ve never tried it but that’s what this was made for pretty much.

Also, if you bathe the baby in your tub and you’re on your knees and elbows the whole time you NEED, like neeeeeeedddddd, a kneeler and an elbow rest. I cannot bathe him without this stuff I swear it is a life saver.

OK actually three things.

The last one is a rinser. Unless your baby like water in his/her face then you need to get one. But not just any rinser. It needs to be comfortable, soft, and and actually practical. This is my favorite.

P.S. If you have any tub recommendation please comment below, he’s outgrowing this one already, and I’ve tried a few other ones and returned them. They were just so stiff and so uncomfortable. Please help!


Oxi Clean Baby Stain Soaker Powder

Does your baby poop? YES.

Does your baby have poop explosions? YESS.

Does your babies poop stain their clothes? YESSS.

Okay then, you need this. It is the only thing that removes my sons poop stains from his clothes. It also removes blood stains. Wondering why I’m trying to get rid of blood stains. Well, its an interesting story. I accidentally cut a little bit of my sons skin when I was cutting his nails, but didn’t notice because he didn’t even flinch or cry lol. Then five minutes later, I see a bunch of blood on his little rocker chair I put him in and it was all over the fabric and his clothes. Anyways, I soaked all that stuff in cold water with a bunch of oxi clean and it was all gone! Oh, and those bright yellow poop stains I use hot water and soak. All gone.

Don’t forget to wash per usual after.

Hope you guys enjoyed this post, thanks for reading!

Comment some of your favorite baby products below, I love trying out your recommendations!



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Postpartum Girdle

I posted a photo wearing my Postpartum Girdle and got so many DM’s on which one I was wearing so I figured I do a blog post about it. IMG_9575

When I was pregnant a lot of my friends and family suggested I purchase a girdle and use it soon after birth. I know most doctors advise you to wait at least 6 weeks for the uterus to shrink but everyone said my stomach will probably start to loosen by then to the point of no return. That scared me, so I did my research on which girdle to purchase. Based on all the reviews this was the best girdle on the internet for postpartum women. I liked it because it had adjustments down there and on the stomach which I thought was convenient. It was also advertised as a post c-section girdle and I figured if I had to have an emergency c-section then at least I would have a girdle to support that. Didn’t end up having a c-section, although I wish I had since my labor was traumatic AF, but I did use the corset regardless. My hospital gave me this white band that you tie around your stomach and it was stretchy and so comfortable and that’s what I used every single day for a few weeks because the girdle was just way too painful for the first month after birth. Once the band started to get way too loose I transitioned into the girdle, and although it was uncomfortable I forced myself because I did not want a loose stomach (#beautyispain)! I would wear it most of the day until it started to get really uncomfortable. When I stopped wearing it, after a month of wearing it almost every single day, I started to notice my stomach loosen. I freaked out and now I’m back to wearing it every day and the difference is crazy, this stuff really works.

I would suggest this product over the wrap-around bands because when you move around the band starts to cut through your skin and rise up making your love handles stick out. But this pull-up takes care of your love handles AND goes all the way up to under your breasts so it takes care of any back fat you might have (major plus).

Just some tips before purchasing:

  • This does run small so make sure you follow the measurement guide before purchasing (I ordered medium and it fits perfectly)
  • Wear it everyday if you want to notice a difference
  • Wear it sooner rather than later after birth
  • I would suggest wearing it and walking around versus sitting all the time because it does tend to move down when you sit (you just need to pull it back up)
  • You can sleep in this, I did this on days when I didn’t have time to wear it or I forgot, not very comfy but I think it still counts lol (or at least it does in my head)

I hope that answers all your postpartum girdle questions, comment below if you have any more.

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